SIG CON Research Symposium: [Insert Title Here: Make Sure to Satisfy Titular Colonicity]

EDITOR'S SUMMARY

Bringing comic relief to the 2015 ASIS&T Annual Meeting, SIG CON opened with discovery that the alleged nephew of the group's figurehead, Dr. Llewellyn C. Puppybreath III, and speaker at the 2014 meeting was an imposter of dubious character. With the purloined ceremonial wand accounted for, the 2015 symposium opened with a presentation on the I-Index, an anti-establishment altmetric, eschewing group recognition in favor of individualism and self-citation. A paper on the correlation among computer science doctorates, rising arcade revenues and climate warming in Australia highlighted the income and career opportunities available to techies relocating to Oz. Analysis of ASIS&T members' social media posts revealed a skewed distribution of posters, topics and irrelevant content, especially by Association leadership. The session also featured a Monty Python character reporting on fatal answers at the Bridge of Death, multiple personalities of Dr. N. E. Doofus and a séance with illustrious ASIS&T members spanning the spectrum from living to dead.