Transgender Men Forming Two-Father Families with Their Cisgender Male Partners: Negotiating Gendered Expectations and Self-Perceptions

Abstract

This article explores the experiences of transgender men who became parents through childbirth and started families with their cisgender male partners. The study explores the transgender men’s experiences of having and raising children in this family constellation, with a specific focus on how they experience gender in their parenting role. Semi-structured inter-views were conducted with three participants. The data was transcribed and analyzed with thematic analysis. Results of the analysis showed that the participants had experienced gender dysphoria before and during pregnancy, but also embraced their childbearing capacity. As transgender fathers, they found themselves expected to fulfill gendered expectations for women and mothers but sometimes appreciated access to women’s spaces. The participants had employed different strategies to protect their masculine selves, such as concealing their pregnancy and/or defending the right to be respected as transgender pregnant men. When passing as cisgender men, they experienced being praised for taking care of their children. They did not receive such praise when they were assumed to be women or known to be transgender men. The men struggled with inequality in their relationships, reflecting each partner’s assigned gender at birth. Still, they emphasized that same-gender relationships facilitated attempts to achieve equality.