Project Diary: Universal serial receiver

My granny has a computer. She's had it for ages, as long as I can remember. It's so old that it isn't connected to the Internet, but that doesn't matter because she only uses it to write stories about our family. I love them. How she and grandpa got together, the lives of their grandparents… it's brilliant. Anyway, one day her printer stopped working and we decided to buy a new one. The ink jets were probably clogged and replacing them would have set her back £50; about the price of a new printer. She'd had the printer for five years and it didn't owe her anything. So we took her to the usual warehouse outlets to get another one – and found that all of the modern printers require a USB port. Unfortunately, her computer is so old that it doesn't have a USB port, just a parallel port (for the printer) and a serial port (for the mouse). Big problem.