Mystory as an international graduate student: a socialization autoethnography

Purpose The purpose of this study is to seek answers to how receiving his PhD at the University of Alabama influenced the author’s ongoing academic discourse socialization as an international graduate student coming from Turkey. To that end, the author incorporates second language and academic discourse socialization theories with the concept of “desire” in TESOL. Design/methodology/approach In this autoethnographic paper, the author discusses his academic discourse socialization as an international graduate student in the form of an evocative autoethnography of socialization. The author uses data gathered through his personal memory in the form of self-reflections. Using Chang’s “chronicling the past strategy” (2008, p. 72), the author prepared a data chart, which included information regarding the data source, its mode, time, venue and stories gleaned. The author used this data chart as a self-generated document to guide him through the selection process of his personal memories in an organized way while writing mystory. Findings The findings show that his academic discourse socialization was mainly influenced by the attitudes of local US citizens’ and existing members of international communities in both on- and off-campus settings. Over time, his academic discourse socialization turned out to be a complex process where the author oftentimes found himself struggling to find an entry point in extracurricular conversations and interactions. Research limitations/implications The author recommends further research to focus on the inner worlds of both old(er) timers and newcomers to understand the challenges, emotions and nuances that are at play in both L2 socialization and academic discourse socialization of international students. Originality/value In this autoethnographic study, the author offers a unique example of an international PhD student’s transnational socialization experiences. Future international students, higher education administrators, faculty members and local graduate students may learn from his autoethnography and approach their future academic relationships in a more informed way.