Self-Examination

Abstract

All traces of foreign matter must be wiped away: discard dust and debris trapped between toes; soak hangnails and calluses in 1 part vinegar, 2 parts water remove nail polish, also nail polish remover; inspect feet: tops and bottoms; scrub ankles with coarse sponge to get rid of dirt (note: the most common forms of ankle grime —like doubt—are rarely discernible to the human eye); apply a pumice stone to legs rubbing out hair stubble, old scars, and impurities; focus on areas around, underneath and behind knees, which are particularly susceptible to dead skin; cleanse thighs (folds and creases require unfolding and uncreasing); using a rearview mirror, closely examine right buttock, then left; pubic hair, if not shorn, should be scrupulously combed; carefully cleanse vagina, rinse, repeat three times; apply q-tips dipped in peroxide to navel area, keeping in mind that dust is merely a physical manifestation of spiritual iniquities; wash breasts and nipples (*breastfeeding mothers: be sure to eliminate dried breastmilk and scar tissue); hands are to be cleaned in a manner similar to feet —tops, bottoms, fingers in-between—; elbows are like knees, see above; shoulders and underarms are particularly prone to smut, as is the space between collarbone and neck; don’t forget: upper back, behind ears, back of neck, etc.