The social process of involuntary separation and the search for connection

Placing a loved one in care does not relieve informal caregivers’ physical and emotional stresses. This study identified the unique psycho-social-spiritual processes of involuntary separation among spouses following long-term care admission. Participants were 17 spouse-caregivers (12 women and 5 men) with a mean age of 84 years who had been involuntarily separated for an average of 20 months. The basic psycho-social-spiritual process of spouse-caregiver involuntary separation was connecting in disconnection, which had three distinct stages: (1) Initial coping, (2) Adjusting to the new situation, and (3) Moving forward. Movement through the three stages was influenced by individuals’ capacity and willingness to reach out for connection and by the abilities of others to extend accurate empathy and practical help. The implications of this study highlight spouse-caregivers’ needs for connection and support not only during the crisis of separation, but in the months and years that follow.