Crossfade, and: my eyes phosphene bodies beneath my hips, and: the devil's wives

Callaloo Pub Date : 2024-08-29 DOI:10.1353/cal.2024.a935718

Nitajade

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[End Page 43] Ancestor visits your sleep \\ asks if you have something to say \\ pauses long enough to hear your answer \\ makes space for you to sit \\ Ancestor challenges your tongue \\ to split in testimony \\\\ in waking life \\ when you voice your visitor \\ all your mama hears is thisisit! \\ her tone insists \\ tellmewhohurtyou! \\ tellme!tellme!tellme!say! \\ call them out and \\ i'll call away they breath \\\\ you can't remember vividly \\ enough to gamble lives on \\\\ yet, you know your molestation(s) \\ the same way you know \\ your names: one day out the blue \\ they were called on you \\\\ syllables swallowed \\ so often \\ you can't recall \\ the first time \\ you spoke them \\ (your names \\ not theirs) \\\\ your mama needs \\ a rescinded-stamped confession \\ your mama needs \\\\ un-gulped wine \\ she needs \\ un-inhaled blunt \\ she needs \\ unmarred midnight moon \\ a trick of the light \\ illusions of successful safety \\ smoke in mirrors \\ your mama needs erasure \\\\ until your tongue reverses \\ or (un)splits \\ she will never stop \\ reaching \\ for their names. [End Page 44] Ancestor visits your sleep \\ asks if you have something to say \\ pauses long enough to hear your answer \\ makes space for you to sit \\ Ancestor challenges your tongue \\ to split in testimony \\\\ in waking life \\ when you voice your visitor \\ all your mama hears is thisisit! \\ her tone insists \\ tellmewhohurtyou! \\ tellme!tellme!tellme!say! \\ call them out and \\ i'll call away they breath \\\\ you can't remember vividly \\ enough to gamble lives on \\\\ yet, you know your molestation(s) \\ the same way you know \\ your names: one day out the blue \\ they were called on you \\\\ syllables swallowed \\ so often \\ you can't recall \\ the first time \\ you spoke them \\ (your names \\ not theirs) \\\\ your mama needs \\ a rescinded-stamped confession \\ your mama needs \\\\ un-gulped wine \\ she needs \\ un-inhaled blunt \\ she needs \\ unmarred midnight moon \\ a trick of the light \\ illusions of successful safety \\ smoke in mirrors \\ your mama needs erasure \\\\ until your tongue reverses \\ or (un)splits \\ she will never stop \\ reaching \\ for their names. [End Page 45] <h2>MY EYES PHOSPHENE BODIES BENEATH MY HIPS</h2> & my arms can erase & conjure.see them in action: one arm deletes light,drapes across vision,blocks morning sun. other arm nestlesdown warm-thick belly,calls up pools in private tongue recalls melting whimpers into thank yous here is where incantationscast like pairs of dice. whereunremembered / unforgotten hands are hexed. shamed stonesgag up & out of throats herethe sin is good, is daily worship, is sal(i)vation, is here & here & there & right there & [End Page 46] <h2>THE DEVIL'S WIVES</h2> today, we divine our walk,our uphill saunters, thunder-clappedbrown skin bolted in storms. we praise sweatcollecting about our shoulders.glistenin,' throwin' backsun's glow in witty retort we rejoice rain, clever dropsswirling with water we makeestuary by happenstance we praise phenomenatrickling along our chests,salted rivers forkingtributaries around areolas join us in worship: streamsbegetting creeks begettingsprings at our navels, our... 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[End Page 43] Ancestor visits your sleep \\\\ asks if you have something to say \\\\ pauses long enough to hear your answer \\\\ makes space for you to sit \\\\ Ancestor challenges your tongue \\\\ to split in testimony \\\\\\\\ in waking life \\\\ when you voice your visitor \\\\ all your mama hears is thisisit! \\\\ her tone insists \\\\ tellmewhohurtyou! \\\\ tellme!tellme!tellme!say! \\\\ call them out and \\\\ i'll call away they breath \\\\\\\\ you can't remember vividly \\\\ enough to gamble lives on \\\\\\\\ yet, you know your molestation(s) \\\\ the same way you know \\\\ your names: one day out the blue \\\\ they were called on you \\\\\\\\ syllables swallowed \\\\ so often \\\\ you can't recall \\\\ the first time \\\\ you spoke them \\\\ (your names \\\\ not theirs) \\\\\\\\ your mama needs \\\\ a rescinded-stamped confession \\\\ your mama needs \\\\\\\\ un-gulped wine \\\\ she needs \\\\ un-inhaled blunt \\\\ she needs \\\\ unmarred midnight moon \\\\ a trick of the light \\\\ illusions of successful safety \\\\ smoke in mirrors \\\\ your mama needs erasure \\\\\\\\ until your tongue reverses \\\\ or (un)splits \\\\ she will never stop \\\\ reaching \\\\ for their names. 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引用次数: 0

摘要

以下是内容的简要摘录，以代替摘要： Crossfade，and： my eyes phosphene bodies beneath my hips，and： the devil's wives Nitajade (bio) CROSSFADE Ancestor visits your sleep （祖先访问你的睡眠） Ask if you have something to say （问你是否有话要说）停顿足够长的时间来听你的回答（腾出空间让你坐下） Make space for you to sit （祖先挑战你的舌头） to split in testimony （在清醒的生活中） in waking life （当你说出你的来访者） when you voice your visitor （你妈妈听到的只是这个来访者） all your mama hears is thisisit！\ tell me whohurtyou！\ tell me! tell me! tell me! say！\ call them out and I'll call away they breath you can't remember vividly enough to gamble lives on yet, you know your molestation (s) the same way you know your names：You can't recall the first time you spoke them （你的名字，不是他们的）（你妈妈需要）（撤销盖章的忏悔）（你妈妈需要）（未咽下的酒）（她需要）（未吸入的钝器）她需要的是（未被玷污的）午夜的月亮（灯光的诡计）（成功安全的幻想）（镜子里的烟雾）（你妈妈需要的是（抹去））（直到你的舌头反转或（未）分裂）（她永远不会停止）（去找寻他们的名字）[祖先访问你的睡眠（问你是否有话要说）（停顿足够长的时间来听你的回答）（为你腾出空间来坐下）（祖先挑战你的舌头（在证词中分裂）（在清醒的生活中）（当你说出你的来访者时）（你的妈妈听到的只是thisisit！\ tell me whohurtyou！\ tell me! tell me! tell me! say！\ call them out and I'll call away they breath you can't remember vividly enough to gamble lives on yet, you know your molestation (s) the same way you know your names：You can't recall the first time you spoke them （你的名字，不是他们的）（你妈妈需要）（一份撤销盖章的忏悔书）（你妈妈需要）（未咽下的酒）（她需要）（未吸入的钝器）she needs unmarred midnight moon a trick of the light illusions of successful safety smoke in mirrors your mama needs erasure until your tongue reverses or (un)splits she will never stop reaching for their names.[祖先访问你的睡眠（问你是否有话要说）（停顿足够长的时间来听你的回答）（为你腾出空间来坐下）（祖先挑战你的舌头（在证词中分裂）（在清醒的生活中）（当你说出你的来访者时）（你的妈妈听到的只是thisisit！\ tell me whohurtyou！\ tell me! tell me! tell me! say！\ call them out and I'll call away they breath you can't remember vividly enough to gamble lives on yet, you know your molestation (s) the same way you know your names：You can't recall the first time you spoke them （你的名字，不是他们的）（你妈妈需要）（一份撤销盖章的忏悔书）（你妈妈需要）（未咽下的酒）（她需要）（未吸入的钝器）she needs unmarred midnight moon a trick of the light illusions of successful safety smoke in mirrors your mama needs erasure until your tongue reverses or (un)splits she will never stop reaching for their names.[我的双臂可以擦除和变幻，请看它们的动作：一只手臂删除光线，遮住视线，挡住清晨的阳光，另一只手臂偎依在温暖厚实的腹部，用私密的舌头唤起水池，将呜咽融化成感谢这里是咒语像骰子一样被投掷的地方，在这里，不被记住/不被遗忘的双手被施咒。在这里，羞耻的石头堵住了喉咙，在这里，罪恶是美好的，是每日的崇拜，是救赎，在这里，在这里，在这里，在那里，就在那里，就在那里。我们赞美汗水汇集在我们的肩头，我们赞美雨水，聪明的水滴在我们的胸口打转，我们赞美咸咸的河水在我们的乳晕周围分流，我们赞美溪流在我们的肚脐上跳跃，我们赞美......我们赞美......我们赞美......我们赞美......"。

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Crossfade, and: my eyes phosphene bodies beneath my hips, and: the devil's wives

In lieu of an abstract, here is a brief excerpt of the content:

Crossfade, and: my eyes phosphene bodies beneath my hips, and: the devil's wives
Nitajade (bio)

CROSSFADE

Ancestor visits your sleep \ asks if you have something to say \ pauses long enough to hear your answer \ makes space for you to sit \ Ancestor challenges your tongue \ to split in testimony \\ in waking life \ when you voice your visitor \ all your mama hears is thisisit! \ her tone insists \ tellmewhohurtyou! \ tellme!tellme!tellme!say! \ call them out and \ i'll call away they breath \\ you can't remember vividly \ enough to gamble lives on \\ yet, you know your molestation(s) \ the same way you know \ your names: one day out the blue \ they were called on you \\ syllables swallowed \ so often \ you can't recall \ the first time \ you spoke them \ (your names \ not theirs) \\ your mama needs \ rescinded-stamped confession \ your mama needs \\ un-gulped wine \ she needs \ un-inhaled blunt \ she needs \ unmarred midnight moon \ a trick of the light \ illusions of successful safety \ smoke in mirrors \ your mama needs erasure \\ until your tongue reverses \ or (un)splits \ she will never stop \ reaching \ for their names. [End Page 43]

Ancestor visits your sleep \ asks if you have something to say \ pauses long enough to hear your answer \ makes space for you to sit \ Ancestor challenges your tongue \ to split in testimony \\ in waking life \ when you voice your visitor \ all your mama hears is thisisit! \ her tone insists \ tellmewhohurtyou! \ tellme!tellme!tellme!say! \ call them out and \ i'll call away they breath \\ you can't remember vividly \ enough to gamble lives on \\ yet, you know your molestation(s) \ the same way you know \ your names: one day out the blue \ they were called on you \\ syllables swallowed \ so often \ you can't recall \ the first time \ you spoke them \ (your names \ not theirs) \\ your mama needs \ a rescinded-stamped confession \ your mama needs \\ un-gulped wine \ she needs \ un-inhaled blunt \ she needs \ unmarred midnight moon \ a trick of the light \ illusions of successful safety \ smoke in mirrors \ your mama needs erasure \\ until your tongue reverses \ or (un)splits \ she will never stop \ reaching \ for their names. [End Page 44]

Ancestor visits your sleep \ asks if you have something to say \ pauses long enough to hear your answer \ makes space for you to sit \ Ancestor challenges your tongue \ to split in testimony \\ in waking life \ when you voice your visitor \ all your mama hears is thisisit! \ her tone insists \ tellmewhohurtyou! \ tellme!tellme!tellme!say! \ call them out and \ i'll call away they breath \\ you can't remember vividly \ enough to gamble lives on \\ yet, you know your molestation(s) \ the same way you know \ your names: one day out the blue \ they were called on you \\ syllables swallowed \ so often \ you can't recall \ the first time \ you spoke them \ (your names \ not theirs) \\ your mama needs \ a rescinded-stamped confession \ your mama needs \\ un-gulped wine \ she needs \ un-inhaled blunt \ she needs \ unmarred midnight moon \ a trick of the light \ illusions of successful safety \ smoke in mirrors \ your mama needs erasure \\ until your tongue reverses \ or (un)splits \ she will never stop \ reaching \ for their names. [End Page 45]